But I have learned something from J that he didn't mean to teach me.But I have learned something from J that he didn't mean to teach me. What he wants in our relationship can't be very easy to find; I mean, even bringing up the subject of bondage was an almost insurmountable obstacle in itself. It would be almost impossible for him to find anyone else that could be the kind of person he wants. If I can be that person, I will be irreplaceable. He'd never find another one like me, never. If, somewhere inside, I'm really like that, I'll have him trapped, tied (bound?) to me by the fact that I'm the only one that he will ever find that can give him what he needs. Maybe I am that kind of person. I certainly feel that way right now, after the first day. If I could feel this excited about our relationship forever, I guess I'd become that kind of person. So anyway, there we were in the restaurant. After all that talking, I felt like a little applied theory, so I asked him what he would do first when we started. I looked him straight in the eye and gave him my most brazenly innocent look across the table. I can wear my innocence at such a rakish angle it makes me seem positively debauched. |