So what happened? It looked like you were really enjoying it", I tease again.So what happened? It looked like you were really enjoying it", I tease again. The boy giggles, somewhere between innocence and obscenity, then changing to the later he whispers, "Let's fuck, okay? I'll tell you later." I smile at the boy's vulgar desire expressed so shamelessly, so openly. He is only eleven and he is physically immature but he is also easily and often aroused. His crude and uninhibited lust seems playfully innocent. It is still a game to him. He sits up grinning cheekily, ready and eager to play. "Come on," he teases, as he reaches his small warm hand down and grasps my penis tightly, "Lemme get him real hard first, okay?" But although he is playful, Rafael is anything but innocent. Others before me have seen to that. I know very little about the boy before he was ten years old. What Rafael remembers he prefers to try to forget. From what he has told me I know that his first sexual experience occurred before he was eight years old. There have been many more in the three years that followed. From his file at Centerville Planation, the home for boys where he has spent five years of his life, I learned the following. Rafael was the child of a Puerto Rican woman and a father that he never knew. His father may have been American, there is no record of the father on his birth certificate and Rafael does not remember him. From his coloring and physical appearance I think the man was white, because Rafael's complexion, while dark, is not as dark as most Puerto Ricans. At the age of four the boy was abandoned at a state-run day care center. His mother left him there while she was looking for a job, at least that was her story at the time. She did not return in the afternoon and in the years that followed, never came back to get him. Rafael has never heard what happened to her. I suspect that she died from a drug overdose but I really don't know. |