It's not just polishing and perfecting myself that fascinates me, though.It's not just polishing and perfecting myself that fascinates me, though. I like being able to change myself, too. I have experimented with just about everything about me that can be changed: my hair, my makeup, my clothing styles, everything. It's almost like a compulsion to try something--anything--else. I get a thrill out of being some- thing different than I am, I guess. It's a good thing "do-it-yourself plastic surgery" isn't a reality: I would probably do it. Really. It doesn't sound like a very healthy self-image now that I write it down. When I got back from the spa the post office had left a note that my sewing machine arrived at the local post office. I shipped it and some other stuff from Chicago before I drove down here. I'm going to pick it up myself tomorrow. I should have used U.P.S. I would have done a better job with the curtains if I had waited for it to arrive, but I was antsy. -*- Tuesday. J has started on some kind of project. You're going to think this is weird. Even I do. I didn't know what he was doing at first: yesterday evening he tied me on the oak table again, the same as before, but with my legs straight on the top of the table, ankles tied at the edges, and with a plastic drop-cloth under me. He scotch- taped saran-wrap over my sex and then covered me from just below my breasts to my upper hips with petroleum jelly. That part was a little sexy, but I was mostly mystified. Then with me craning my neck to watch, he mixed plaster of paris in a big bucket on the floor by the table. At that point I had figured out that he was going to make a plaster cast of my front. I was half right. Anyway, tying me down was just to keep my attention. When he smeared the plaster over my lubricated torso, it was kind of an interesting feeling, cool and slippery at first but warmer as it began to set. He had imbedded strips of cloth in the plaster partly to strengthen it, and partly to tie it into the other sections of the cast when he added them later. |